Top 10 Practices for Building Relationships to Grow Your Consulting Firm

In today’s fast-moving consulting world, metrics lead board discussions, dashboards fill screens, and deliverables define performance standards. Yet, despite all the data-driven choices, one key principle remains constant: relationships are the most valuable competitive edge.

In my twenty years advising global consulting firms, I’ve seen a consistent truth: the firms that win regularly don’t always have the biggest teams, the deepest pockets, or even the most innovative solutions. They succeed because they earn trust early and keep it longer than their competitors. They understand that while expertise opens doors, relationships are what keep those doors open.

So, what’s the key to turning what great rainmakers do instinctively—transforming relationships into a scalable, repeatable growth strategy? It’s about shifting relationships from reactive to intentional, from casual to strategic, and from invisible to measurable.

Below are ten practical relationship-building disciplines every consulting firm should adopt. These aren’t one-time campaigns or annual initiatives—they are daily habits that, when integrated into a firm’s culture, provide a clear competitive advantage.

1. Focus on Your Top 50 – If everything is a priority, nothing is. Start by identifying the 50 relationships that are most crucial to your growth—your mix of clients, alumni, strategic partners, and industry influencers. These are the people whose trust and support will have the biggest impact on your pipeline, reputation, and revenue.

Once identified, assign internal ownership to each relationship. Review these 50 relationships monthly as part of your growth routine.

When firms lack clarity in this area, they risk overcommitting, missing follow-ups, and ultimately losing influence in key areas. Strategic clarity promotes growth; ambiguity can decrease revenue.

2. Make Relationships Measurable – The saying is true: what you measure improves. Too many consulting firms treat relationships as intangible or anecdotal. Instead, track the frequency of interactions, the quality of engagement, relationship momentum, and the scope of connections within the client organization.

A relationship dashboard does more than just display activity—it uncovers trends and vulnerabilities before they become missed opportunities. The right relationship nurturing platform makes the unseen visible, turning intuition into clear, actionable insights. 

3. Create a Reliable Touchpoint Cadence - Relationships are like muscles: they strengthen with use and weaken with neglect. Develop a 30-60-90 day cadence for your top 50 relationships:

• 30 days: Personal touches (a note, a LinkedIn comment, a congratulatory message)

• 60 days: Professional value-add (sharing insights, relevant articles, or briefings)

• 90 days: A meaningful check-in or meeting that deepens the partnership

This approach maintains relationships and ensures continuous value flow—without overloading your team.

4. Map Influence, Not Just Titles – Most firms rely on org charts, but relationships grow through networks of influence. To protect and expand client relationships, identify the:

• Economic buyer – controls the budget

• Internal champion – advocates for your firm

• Political navigator – understands internal dynamics

• Skeptic or resistor – the one who must be won over

Mapping this ecosystem of influence helps prevent over-reliance on a single contact and boosts account resilience amidst turnover or shifting priorities.

5. Brief and Debrief with Purpose – Too often, consulting teams treat client interactions as isolated events. Instead, adopt a briefing and debriefing discipline:

• Before a meeting: Align on relationship context, not just the agenda. Discuss stakeholder dynamics, recent shifts, and strategic goals.

• After a meeting: Capture what changed—decision-making signals, new stakeholders, emerging tensions. Identify follow-ups that advance the relationship, not just the project.

When teams develop this habit, each interaction enhances the company’s relational capital.

6. Celebrate with Authenticity – The smallest gestures often leave the largest impressions. Celebrate milestones and achievements with authenticity and thoughtfulness:

• A handwritten note for a promotion

• A LinkedIn comment that feels personal, not generic

• A timely article shared without expectation

It’s not the size or cost of the gesture that matters, but the message that you see the client as a person, not just a project. This is how loyalty grows over time.

7. Make Relationship Development a Core Discipline – Exceptional relationship builders are not born—they’re built by culture and systems. Integrate relationship development into onboarding and coaching for all client-facing team members.

Define success by measuring engagement frequency, influence depth, and internal referrals every quarter. Recognize and reward relational excellence alongside financial achievements.

When relationship-building turns into a team effort, firms stop relying on a few rainmakers and foster sustainable, scalable growth.

8. Reconnect Dormant Relationships – Your next opportunity may come from your past. Former clients, past champions, and old referral sources carry embedded trust that new prospects do not.

Reactivation strategy: Identify contacts who have changed companies or roles. Reach out with curiosity and no immediate agenda. Rebuild the human connection first; business often follows naturally.

I’ve seen firms unlock six-figure opportunities just by reactivating relationships they believed were gone.

9. Elevate Every Conversation – Many consulting conversations remain transactional—focused on projects, deliverables, and status updates. True growth happens when you elevate the dialogue. Ask questions that create strategic visibility:

• “How is your decision-making process evolving?”

• “Where is internal friction slowing progress?”

• “What will define success for you 12 months from now?”

These questions transform the relationship from vendor to trusted partner and create opportunities for long-term, transformational work.

 10. Focus on Momentum, Not Just Activity – Checking boxes is not the same as building trust. Tracking activity—calls, emails, and meetings—doesn’t tell you if the relationship is strengthening or eroding. Instead, measure momentum signals:

• Stakeholders respond faster and more proactively

• Conversations expand to additional topics or stakeholders

• Referrals or introductions start happening organically

Momentum is the truest indicator that a relationship is moving toward growth—or risk.

Operationalizing the Invisible

As we already understand, consulting firms excel at creating structure. However, when it comes to their most valuable asset—relationships—many still depend on instinct rather than deliberate effort. Since relationships don’t appear in dashboards or spreadsheets, they are often viewed as abstract or secondary. The reality is simple: what remains unseen becomes unmanaged, and what’s unmanaged becomes a vulnerability.

The firms that will lead in the next decade are those that view relationships as measurable, transferable assets—similar to revenue or margin. It all starts with visibility. Without clarity on where trust is growing, stagnating, or weakening, companies operate blindly. Monitoring engagement quality, contact scope, and relationship momentum allows leaders to spot opportunities and risks before they impact the business.

Resilience is the next step. When key relationships rely on a single individual, a single transition—retirement, resignation, or role change—can jeopardize millions. Trust must be linked to the organization, not just a person. Developing multi-threaded relationships across teams ensures continuity and maintains long-term value.

Consistency is the final element. Relationship-building can’t be sporadic or limited to rainmakers. It needs to become part of the firm’s daily routine—integrated into team meetings, career development, and account strategy. Expected. Coached. Rewarded. 

Relationships aren’t built through reports or proposals. They are developed through moments—small, deliberate, consistent actions that, when supported by structure and shared accountability, grow into trust, loyalty, and revenue. Firms that shift from reacting to relationships to intentionally nurturing them will not only grow but also establish a strong, defensible advantage in a competitive market.